Ends Meat: "Return Play Wasn't on the Menu" (excerpt from unpublished manuscript)

It had become a part of his life.  It was so voracious, everyone he knew was doing it.

John knocked on the door three times.  It opened.  A handsome, middle-aged man stood there in a suit and tie.  His dark hair was short and cropped to his head and he had a thick mustache.  He almost looked like Freddie Mercury.  He held up a wad of bills that he handed over to John who took a quick count.

“You know what I want,” the man said.

John nodded and took hold of the man’s tie then pushed himself inside where he closed the door and commanded that the man strip.

“Strip me,” the man said.  “But be careful it’s expensive.”

There were many ways to handle what the man said.  When he first started John would have done as the man asked yet still tried to keep some element of control.  He took hold of the cloth and pulled so that the buttons popped.

“You’re going to need to see a tailor,” he said before untucking the shirt and unfastening the bottom buttons.  The man smiled.  He undid the belt next and then he turned the man and walked him into the apartment through the main room which was well lit and nicely decorated in a minimal but expensive way, through the hallway to the bedroom at the end.

There the man turned on the lights and John pulled him close.  He stripped the man down to his socks.  He used the tie to bind the man’s wrists loosely as he had been told.  He led the man to the bed where he kneeled.  John placed a hand on the man’s shoulder and the man lowered his head.

In front of them on the wall was a large print of Marilyn Monroe as done by Andy Warhol in stark neon colors.  It was painted directly onto the wall.

“How about I make you come on it,” John said.

The man’s shoulders sunk.  John wasn’t sure if it was submission or disappointment so he slapped the man’s left ass cheek which made his shoulders rise.  It was disappointment.  He slapped again.

“Harder,” the man said.

John knew that wasn’t what the man really wanted.  The man had told him what he really wanted.  John moved to the man’s socked feet.  The socks were thin with a strap around the calf to keep them up.  He was a real business man, a professional who got paid lots of money.  John put the tips of his fingers into the man’s feet and began to tickle him.  Up and down the foot to the heel then back in the most sensitive part the man giggled and pretended to struggle in his binding.

“Spank me,” the man said.

“You’ve been a bad boy?”  It was a cliche question that every guy liked to be asked especially if they wanted to be spanked.  Something about that generation of men.

“Tell me.”

“I want you to spank me,” the man commanded.

John rose up from the foot and dealt a quick slap to the man’s ass.

“Harder,” the man said.

“You don’t want me to tickle you anymore?”

“I said, ‘harder’.  So spank me harder.”

John felt like arguing with the man but he didn’t.  There would be just as much reward in spanking the man as he demanded so he took hold of the man by the back of the neck and leaned him forward to spank at his ass freely.  The man’s ass reddened but he didn’t let out anything more than a grunt.  John didn’t count but he had guessed he landed over twenty smacks when his hand became tired.

“I’m going to use my belt,” John said reaching to unfasten it.

“No, no belts, just spank me.”

John laid into the man again whose grunts grew louder.

“My hand is getting tired.  Can I use something else?”

“My ass that tough huh?  Sissy boy,” the man said.  He pulled his hands from the tie and turned to look at John.  He was breathing hard.  John looked to his cock and though it was large it wasn’t very hard.

“You suck and fuck right?”

John nodded.

“How about spanking?”

John shook his head.

“Not tough enough?”

“Look I don’t do it.”

“A trick like you?  I thought you’d do anything for the money?”

“I’ve done it before.  Couple of times but not for anyone, not for you.”  The last part had slipped from his lips.  He shouldn’t have said it.  It wasn’t supposed to mean anything.  He hoped the man didn’t care and so when the man didn’t flinch or react to it John breathed easier.

“Alright, a fuck then.  How much?”

John told him how much more it would be.

“Okay,” the man said.

“But no spanking,” John added.

“Fine, but you have to talk dirty to me like a slut begging for it.”

John nodded and the man stood, took him by the front of his shirt and led him back through the apartment to the living room where he led John to a leather chair where he sat.  The man opened a wooden humidor, took out a cigar and lit it.  He looked to John who stood before the man still dressed and asked what he was waiting for.  John began to undress.

“Well, what about it?”

“Fuck me,” John said.  “I want your big dick.  Please I want you to fuck me.”

He was easily down to his briefs and that was when he moved to the man’s lap.  He continued to talk as he pulled the man’s hands onto his body.  He reached down to feel the man’s dick and it was barely hard but thick and firm, circumcised.  John leaned in to kiss the man but he was stopped.

“A whore’s mouth doesn’t touch these lips.”

John moved to the man’s neck but the man was quick to push him down onto his knees in front of the chair then pull him by his hair to his crotch where John took the head of the man’s cock into his mouth.  The wood was hard on his knees and as he began to suck he knew he had to get the man out to somewhere else.  The man pulled him off his now hardened dick by his hair and pulled his head back to look him in the eye.

He told John to go get him a drink from the bar, vodka with a twist of lime and ice.  John stood, touched at his knees for a second before he walked to the bar where the man pointed.

He found the ice bucket but it was empty.  An inexperienced person would have asked but he looked to the refrigerator where he spotted an ice machine.  He took the bucket over and noticed that the man had stood to stretch.

In the kitchen the man was out of sight and he didn’t see him leave the room with his clothes.  The machine took a while to start and when it spit out ice it was noisy.  John filled the bucket partially then took it back to the bar when he noticed the man was gone.  The rest of the items were there so he made the man a drink as he had asked then made himself the same.

He took a sip then walked with both of them to where he had been giving the man oral sex.  His clothes were gone.  He walked to the only hallway in the place.  The light was still on in the room at the end of the hall but there was another light in a room off to the left.  He had passed the closed door earlier but didn’t think about it much then.  He pushed the door open and stepped into the doorway.

He expected slings and the man to be standing in a leather costume.  He was ready to throw the drink in his face, kick his ass, get his clothes back and get the hell out.  The man was there but still naked.  The room looked like a guest room where the bed was already made and dressers waited empty for a visitor.

“You made yourself a drink?” the man asked.  “Good.  Now get in your knees and suck my dick.”

John walked to the man, handed him his drink, took another sip of his own then sunk to his knees where he found the carpet flooring was much easier.  The man’s cock had softened and hung limp.  Many men would have grabbed it but John moved to it with his lips where he kissed it first, a tease, then he took it in his mouth and began to suck at it.  The man grabbed him by the back of his head with his free hand and pulled him as far as John wanted to take it.

“I’ll teach you slut,” the man said.

John pulled back and heard the man finish his drink then he lowered it and told John to take it in his free hand and hand him the other one.  John did.

“I don’t want your senses dulled,” the man said.

The man pulled him from his cock then began to smack it against John’s lips and the side of his face.  John began to beg for him to stick it back in, for the pleasure of having his face fucked.  The man pulled him onto it then off again and he drank the contents of the glass and handed it back to John.  He squatted before John, his dick pointing out at him from deep between his legs.

“I really like this room,” he said.  “I have everything I need here.  Now stand up I want a piece of that ass.”

The man took hold of John’s neck and he stood.  He let the man pull him to the desk where he bent over, his own semi-hard cock pressing against the wood in an uncomfortable way he looked back over his shoulder and told the man he only played safe.  The man said he had it right here and went over to the drawer of the nightstand.  John set the glasses down and began to adjust his cock when the man was on him again pressing him hard against the wood.

“Uncomfortable?” the man asked.

“Yes,” John grunted.

“Good,” the man said.  He reached down between John’s legs and took hold of his right wrist.  He pulled the arm tight into John’s crotch.  “I used to be on the high school wrestling team.  I was pretty good.  I loved getting guys into this position and see their butt cheeks splayed open for me.  I could never see what was under those singlets but I knew what was there.”  The man stuck his finger just inside John’s asshole and pulled harder on John’s wrist making his arm press into his balls and he cried out in pain.  “Do you know what this is called?”

John had wrestled for a year in junior high but he didn’t know the maneuver.

“No,” John grunted.

“The ball breaker now give me your other arm.”

John reached out and grabbed the desk with his free hand.  He had to think of something, some way out.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” the man said.  “I just want to show you the second part of this move.”

When John didn’t do as he had been told the man spanked him hard on the ass.

“That’s one,” he said.  “How many do you think I can give before my hand tires?”

“Go fuck yourself,” John said.

“No, I’d rather not,” the man said before reaching up across John’s back and taking hold of his other wrist his cock deliberately wedged against John’s asshole.  John let go and the man pulled his hand back until it was past his thigh where he took a pair of handcuffs he had taken from the nightstand and locked them around John’s wrists.  He was stuck, hindered by his own body.

Per Pound of Flesh (not yet published)

Excerpt from Book II, not yet published.

To find out how John got into this position of being a gay 4 pay actor read Per Pound of Flesh now available through Amazon.com for $2.99.

John let out a laugh then replaced the cigarette in his mouth.  He was on a smoke break with Rabbit the only other model at the shoot who smoked.  They stood beside the white exit door in shorts and t-shirts.  Rabbit’s hands roamed over his own body in a nervous, boyish manner.  He pulled out the back of his pants momentarily then the hand moved up to his chest and scratched.

“Seriously, Carl’s dick is so big that I walked funny for days afterwards.  You don’t want any piece of that trust me.  I do not envy you.  I mean it’s a good fuck but you have to be ready to recover for a while.  You won’t shit right the next day.”  Rabbit’s right hand wondered down into his shorts and he began to scratch at his balls.  “How was sucking on it?”

“A mouthful,” he said.

Rabbit laughed.  “And I’ve had my mouth on it so I know.  But that’s what’s great.  A lot of people out there talk and talk about wanting to be in porn but they don’t know what it’s like.

“They will never get in their lives the opportunities we get.  We can have it all.  I mean think about it.  I mean you’re married and if you wouldn’t be doing this you would be stuck with the same person the rest of your life.  You would have no other experiences of life.”

“Conservatives are missing out.”

John found it odd to stand out back of a studio watching a man scratch his own balls, balls he had sucked on, balls that he had gripped and touched, felt against his own balls as he fucked Rabbit and yet it was odd as if the clothing, the lot somehow changed things.

“Damn straight they are but they buy it you know.  The midwest has like the biggest porn addiction, anywhere its boring and they have all these conservative rules people are at home whacking off to the to the shit we do.  We do it for them.  It sells.  And the most conservative people buy it, or they rent it, or they steal it I don’t care.”

“Amen,” John said before taking one last puff before he flicked the butt of into the parking lot.  “Do you want to head back in?”

“Yeah we should go.”

Rabbit threw away his own cigarette butt then followed John into the studio.  He stopped at a table next to the door and called for John to come back.  John turned and saying, “oh right” stepped before Rabbit who sprayed him once from a bottle of breath freshener.

“You know how they hate the smell of smoke.”

“Sissies, we smell like lube and sex anyway.”

“I know right.  Besides I always liked the smell of cigarettes.”

“Me too,” John said.

“Not like their dicks can tell the difference.”

Rabbit set the bottle down and picked up a condom from the bowl on the table.

“This shit is seriously something I don’t miss when I am out on my own.”

They began to walk.

“You fuck without condoms?”

Rabbit waved the packet lightly.

“Sometimes, if I want to, if I trust the guy.  And you should never trust the guy.  But you know I’m negative and if he’s negative.”

“I’d never let someone stick it in me without a condom.”

“And lot’s of lube,” Rabbit said.

They looked to each other and laughed.

“Power-bottoms baby, power-bottoms,” Rabbit held up his hand for a high five which John gave easily.  “Even straight ones.”

They spotted one of their co-stars, Hubert, already on set splayed out on the bed with his limp cock over his left thigh as one of the photographers took pictures.  Rabbit pointed.

“It looks like a giant slug that escaped its shell.”

John laughed as they stepped through the archway of the set.  There behind the fake wall watching Hubert the photographer, with his arms crossed and dressed in a white bathrobe was Carl.

Rabbit began to remove his clothes.  John looked to Carl his partner for the shoot and smiled.  Carl didn’t smile back at first and for a moment with his square muscles, his stern face, John was intimidated.  Then Carl smiled and laughed so John laughed back before he wandered if Carl was laughing at him.

They had already done the promotional shots, the interviews, and the oral.  It was the biggest dick John had ever dealt with so far in his career.  Carl was one of the guys that was all business even though he had been in the business for over a year.  They had shaken hands and said hello and when it came time to shoot they kissed and John sunk to his knees to pull his cock from his pants.  He had slobbered over the thing as he used his best dirty talk and Carl talked back.  Carl was also supposed to be straight.  He was known for his intimidating screen presence, a dominant, power-top who ordered everything he wanted and the other performer tried to follow along.

At the signal of the photographer Rabbit walked to the bed and joined his partner for the shoot.  He was at ease as he leaned onto Hubert.

“Come on Johnny boy strip down so we can get these beautiful dicks up our ass then get out of here.  I have a craving for pancakes with links of sausage.”

“You won’t want any sausage after I’m done with you,” Carl said.

John looked to Carl who was staring at Rabbit.  He pulled off his shirt, dropped his shorts and inhaled deeply.

“John get on the bed there on the other side of Hubert.”

John did as he was instructed.  He let his head also rest on Hubert’s chest and without any coaching he reached down to take hold of Hubert’s cock.  He pulled at it slowly.  Rabbit licked at the man’s nipple before reaching for the back of John’s head and pulling him across the man’s chest for a kiss.  John was familiar with Rabbit’s kiss and to make it look good he feigned passion.

Minutes later he was bent over the bed as Carl inserted his cock between his butt cheeks and into his hole.  It was as filling as he had been told and also like he had been told he feared not being able to walk straight.  As uncomfortable as it was it was also pleasurable and he looked across to Rabbit who made it look easy, maybe too easy.  Some customers didn’t like that.

Rabbit saw him staring over and he reached a hand back across the bed which John took in his own matching hand.  Carl was moving easily now so he started to throw it back and buck.  Carl’s hands ran up his back to his shoulders, he leaned close and John felt warm breath on his ear.  It smelled of garlic and pepperoni, no doubt he had taken a slice of pizza from the refreshment table.  John closed his eyes and let out a moan as the cock buried deep in him struck his prostate forcing a shiver of pleasure through his body.

“You’re straight right?” Carl whispered into his ear.

The question almost brought John out of his revery but he didn’t want to think about it.  Carl slipped his left hand around John’s face and he stuck two fingers in John’s mouth.

“I’ll make you take it in both ends bitch,” Carl said loud enough for the camera.  “You’ll beg me for it.  Come on beg me for it.”

John was usually easy for dirty talk like what Carl said but the comment before about being straight had really hurt him.  He wanted to say something but there were fingers in his mouth so he continued to suckle on them so only a moan escaped from his chest.  Then another as Carl began to pound him.  This was the ride he had signed on for he just wished the guy wasn’t such an asshole.

“Maybe I should take my fingers out of your mouth so you can say my name,” Carl said.  He pulled his fingers out and stood straight up so that his cock was the only fleshy link between their bodies.  His hands fell to his hips and he stopped thrusting.  “Fuck yourself on my dick.”

John began to throw back more, again and again each time let out gasps of air and moans.  Carl began to slap at each cheek of his ass, intermittently rending them in his fingers.

“You love my dick don’t you?”

“I love it,” John said.

“Fuck yourself on my dick boy,” Carl said.

John tried to keep the pace up but he ran out of breath and had to stop.  He leaned onto the bed to rest.

“Too much,” Carl said.  He slid his cock from John then laid it atop John’s backside.  “Looks like a hotdog between buns.  You don’t get anymore of my meat unless you say my name.”

John caught his breath.  It was all for the video, he thought, you have to perform.  So he said Carl’s name.

“Say you want it.  And that you love it.  Come on boy.”

John looked to Rabbit who had his eyes closed and was completely oblivious to John except for their grip and the warmth of his palm.

“I want your cock.  I love your cock.”

“Now roll over on your back so I can look in your face when I make you cream all over your belly.”

Carl smacked him on the ass hard and John let go of Rabbit’s hand.  He began to turn over on his own but Carl was quick to take hold of him and push him onto his back.  He reached down and grabbed John’s ankles pulled them up over his face and he felt Carl’s cock lay for a moment across his own semi-hard cock so the photographer could record it.  Then without saying anything Carl stuck it in deep and hard.  He separated John’s feet and looked down into his eyes.

“Touch my chest like you want to,” Carl said.

John reached up and touched Carl’s hard muscled chest.

“Now get your little dick working so I can show them how much you like my cock.”

John reached down with one hand while still maintaining his other at Carl’s chest and began to stroke at his own cock.  As he knew, as his cock became harder his asshole began to tighten so that when he would work himself into a climax it would be a confusion of pleasure and pain he had done only once before.  Carl reached down to place his fingers at John’s mouth.  He held his lips closed.

“Don’t be that way.  You love it in both ends.”

He looked to the director who was enjoying the show and encouraging him so he let the fingers inside.

“I want you to come all over yourself,” Carl said.

The director nodded.

John pulled at his own dick, worked in a familiar way that always made him come.  He felt it.  He was on the edge.  He closed his eyes but Carl took the fingers out and playfully slapped him on the cheek telling him to look him in the eye.  John did.  He looked Carl in the eye and he felt himself begin to ejaculate.  He felt come hit his face, his chin and down his body.  He felt his dick head which was slick and he began to rub at it eagerly to capture the last feelings of pleasure.

“Do you still love my cock?”

Carl stuck it in deep and left it there.  He took John’s wrists and pushed them above his head.  He leaned in close again and John thought for sure he was going to ask that question again but instead he kissed him and as they kissed he began to thrust again.

He pulled back and slipped his dick out, one last time, he pulled the condom off so John knew what was next as he laid his dick atop John’s and shot load after load of come onto John’s chest.

“I love my cock,” Carl said.

Excerpt from Book II, not yet published.

To find out how John got into this position of being a gay 4 pay actor read Per Pound of Flesh now available through Amazon.com for $2.99.